Last week I confessed to you that I am an ACTIVITY ADDICT.
Today, I have another confession to make.
But first let me share with you a recent struggle I’ve been wrestling with so you can see just how neurotic I can be.
Every December I get inspired to purchase a new planner/journal for the new year. The problem is that there are now SO MANY CHOICES in a planner that it can be paralyzing to just choose one.
So, of course, my logical response is to order four or five and give my “reject” ones away. Crazy, right?
Anyway, once I pick my “perfect” planner, I sit there with pen in hand eagerly anticipating what I will write first. The possibilities are excitingly endless.
- Should I map out my ideal schedule?
- Should I choose some goals for the new year?
- Should I start tracking new habits?
- Should I design a mission statement for my life?
- Should I reflect on what the frick is wrong with me that I cannot decide what to freaking write in this planner...?
When I’m honest with myself, my paralyzation with the page is not so much about my indecisiveness.
My hesitation to write anything in the planner is that I’m afraid that whatever I put on the paper will be WRONG. What?!
Which leads me to my next confession...
I am a PERFECTIONIST.
I have taken the DISC personality test and I am a “DC” personality which stands for Dominant and Compliant.
One of my personality traits is that I tend to see everything as Right or Wrong, Black or White. (However, I am getting better at recognizing shades of gray with each new birthday I celebrate.)
As a “DC,” I am terrified of completing my journal WRONG.
I know, pretty laughable, huh? This isn’t a darn math test for goodness sakes.
The idea that someone can be wrong writing in their own planner or journal which only they will likely read sounds neurotic even to me.
The good news for you is that my neurosis with perfectionism serves my clients well when I am custom crafting their Family Succession Plans. No half-ass efforts from me. I give every plan my undivided effort and attention to ensure that the plan will work as intended.
But alas, the personality trait that serves me well in my law practice can sometimes be crippling in my personal life as my stilted journaling attempts will attest.
I am still agonizing over which planner to choose for the new year but I’m pretty confident I will have one picked out by mid-January. Ha ha.
No telling how long it will take me to actually write something in it!
Kristen “Paralyzed by My Planner” Marks
P.S. Our next Women’s Self-Defense Workshop will be held on Friday, January 18th at Noon at our office. Cost will be $20 and will include a light lunch. Space is limited to 20 attendees. RSVP here.